Get Ready For All The Free Shit – I’M GIVING AWAY CURLYWURLYS BEST BEFORE 9 JUNE

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Good lateness, constituents, and only five days left till the big poll, and I’m not talking about my penis. I’m so busy right now that I don’t have much time left to appeal for your vote on the 8, which is unfortunate, and why I want to let you know, before BIG GIVEAWAY FREE STUFF PLUS REDUCTIONS WEEK really kicks off amongst the other lying shits, that everyone who votes for me will get a FREE CURLYWURLY BEST BEFORE 9 JUNE GUARANTEED.

That’s ONE FREE CURLYWURLY BEST BEFORE 9 JUNE GUARANTEED if you vote for me (non-concurrent with current offer of tins for elderly).

It’s a pleasure to be your curlywurly candidate.

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